Hello smartblondegirl,
I had a MacBook Air 13" M2 and currently have a MacBook Pro 14" M3. From my experience, the "Pro" label simply implies "latest features" whereas the "Air" label implies "baked features." Let me explain. The MacBook Pro will include the most advanced features that Apple has to offer to the Mac (120Hz display, Mini-LED, 12MP Main Camera, up to 1000 nits screen brightness, etc.). The MacBook Air will include time-tested features, but generally nothing "new" per se (60Hz display, LED, 1080p Main Camera, up to 500 nits screen brightness, etc.).
Think of it this way: the MacBook Air inherits features from the MacBook Pro, while the MacBook Pro introduces features. In the long term, this means that a MacBook Pro will be "newer" than a MacBook Air even several years down the road; however, I believe this is where it ends.
As the MacBook Air and the MacBook Pro (base model) will both have the same M-series chips in a few months when the next MacBook Air is released with more inherited features, I would consider what your priorities are. At this point, performance is really not a differentiating factor. What matters is how "new" you want your Mac to feel. Seriously. There is no more "must-have" feature (unless you are legitimately using the device for professional work).
I believe that consumer satisfaction is a very real situation here. As you stated, one person hates her MacBook Air, while the other person loves her MacBook Pro. This, I believe, is what differentiates between the MacBook Air and MacBook Pro in terms of everyday use. The 120Hz ProMotion Mini-LED screen and the speakers are all amazing features. A MacBook Air will always be "boringly" great, but in a good way. On that note:
- If you are looking for an excellent computer to get work done, get the MacBook Air
- If you are looking for a computer that is excellent on top of being exciting, get the MacBook Pro
Even as a software developer, I could switch back to a MacBook Air any day; it just wouldn't feel exciting. Honestly, If I just wanted a computer, I would pick the MacBook air every single time.
Sorry for the long response. That's my take.